Smith (2005) defines junk food as food that has less nutritional with artificial additives and flavourings. Junk food use to be the favourite for all of the kids and it is available everywhere nowadays. The sale of junk food in school canteen has become a disputable issue in the society. According to Health Foundation (2005), moat junk food has low nutritional values. Therefore, I strongly agree that the sale of junk food in school canteen should be banned as junk food contains various types of chemical substances, harms our health and create litter problems in schools.
Firstly, junk food contains various types of chemicals substances such as additives, flavourings, colourings and preservatives. These chemicals make junk food tastier and last longer. However, these synthetic chemicals bring negative impacts on children. Children who consume junk food are hyperactive and less concentrate (Smith 2005). This is also further supported by Green in The Food Show (2005) who says that students behave better in class after their school stop selling junk food. Therefore, it is obvious that students’ academic performance will be affected in the long run.
On top of that, junk is detrimental to our health as well (Smith 2005). High content of fat, oil and sugar can cause obesity especially. According to Australian Nutrition Journal (2004), fat and sugar intake at home among 12-14 year-old Australian children are much higher than recommended. Meanwhile, fresh fruits and vegetables which are strongly recommended are less preferred. This situation is worsened when junk food is sold in school canteen. Children who cannot control end up getting obesity which in turn can cause chronic heart diseases, osteoarthritis and cancers (Weekend News 2005). Besides, Reynolds in Weekend News (2005) also states that junk food increases dental problems among primary-school kids as junk food basically contains excessive sugar. Kamiri, a dietitian from The Food Show (2005) says that school authorities should put students’ health as their priority.
Another consequence of the sale of junk food in school canteen is the litter problem created. Children tend to throw elsewhere once they finish eating their junk food. It severely affects the school reputation with serious litter problem. More over, it adds on the cleaning costs in which can be channeled for more productive purposes for students welfare (Smith 2005). Green in The Food Show (2005) also says that the school compounds are cleaner without the sale of junk food. School cleaners can also have sufficient time to carry out other maintenance works which beneficial to everyone.
All in all, I strongly believe that the sale of junk food in school canteen should be banned as it brings more harm than benefits to school children. It contains many synthetic chemicals, affects our health and gives rise to litter problems. In my opinion, the situations can worsens as school children are not mature enough to deter junk food temptation. Majority of them will end up consume too much. Therefore, it should be banned.
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ReplyDeleteYou started off with well explained definition of junk food. Good job. However I feel that the ‘The sale of junk food in school canteen has become a disputable issue in the society’ and ‘ According to Health Foundation (2005), moat junk food has low nutritional values’ doesn’t really flow with one another. I think you should mention this is supported by Health Foundation (2005), most junk food has low nutritional values. Then, due to that , it becomes a disputable issue. And then connect it with your thesis statement. Thesis statement is clear as you mention your points. Can be improved better with these corrections :(Junk food use to be.. should be ‘used’ and create litter problems should be ‘creates’ and According to Health Foundation (2005), moat junk food should be ‘most’ hehe typo error)
ReplyDeleteFirst paragraph is well explained and well synthesised. Maybe you can improve on the last sentence. For example, , it is obvious that students’ academic performance will be affected in the long run if ‘junk food were not to be banned’. Second paragraph is well structured. I feel that your second paragraph should be the first paragraph. You elaborate it better than the first. Miss Dil did mention to put the best point as the first rite. All about impression. =) As for the third para, i do not have any complains. You did well. (Moreover is a joint word.)
U summarise the points in conclusion. Good. Improve on the following..
It contains many synthetic chemicals WHICH affects our health and gives rise to litter problems. The rest is ok. Overall, you included all the main point. Everything written is clear and straight to the point with examples. All sources are acknowledge accordingly.
Thx a lot..Michelle~=p
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